Sunday, July 28, 2013


My dreams were dealt a major blow today.  While I’ve had four interviews, thus far, it was the 4th Grade class at Ocean Breeze Elementary School I had my heart set on.  For this interview I prepared like a mad man; I was focused and primed, ready to impress.  I put on my best shirt and tie, primped my hair, and shinned my shoes.  I was ready!

I nailed the interview, hitting key points on all the questions, had great rapport with the principle, and made what I thought was a good impression.  I felt good, in fact I felt great.  So then I waited.  Two days go by, then three.  They had fifty some teachers to interview, so I kept telling myself to be patient.  Four days gone, then it’s the weekend.  My hopes began to fade, and then today it came.  The thanks, but no thanks, letter.  I was (am) devastated.  I REALLY wanted that job.

So what now?  Is the dream of being a teacher over?  The pursuit of this dream has presented me and my family with numerous challenges.  I have kept my focus on becoming a teacher and I will never know what other opportunities I have missed.  I have been on unemployment for nearly a year now, somehow we have managed, but did I let my teaching dream come before the well-being of my family?  These questions have given me sleepless nights as I pondered what might have been. 

So what is next?  I am at a major crossroad in my life.  There is only one thing I want more than a teaching job, and that is a happy family.  I can (and will) continue going to school, which is certain.  But I must decide if I will continue to be a substitute for the upcoming year.   Is moving my family and uprooting my daughter from her school to pursue a teaching position elsewhere worth it?  Should I hold out hope for a short term position?   While getting additional certifications will help out my resume, they take money, and are just not feasible right now.   The decision will be hard, but it needs to be made…and quickly.

Dreams are not always obtainable, and sometimes we fall short.  It is the pursuit of these dreams that keeps us going, and I have not given up on mine.  I will continue to work hard in pursuit, but the road just got a little steeper. 

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